A Peek Into My Past as a “Closeted Deaf Person”
I was inspired by reading A Deaf Mom Shares Her World’s blogpost called, “Are You in the Deaf/Hard of Hearing Closet?” and I read Jodi’s a.k.a. American Mom in Tuscany and Miss Kat’s blog entries too.
My heart tugged.
I got some flashbacks.
I became emotional,
and I went through my old things, old scrapbooks, old CD’s, and old notes that I’ve saved since I was a little girl.
Now, I’ll allow you to take a special peek into my past as a “closeted Deaf person”, by sharing my poems I wrote during high school.
My high school experience was pivotal for me because it was in a mainstream setting with 60 deaf and hard of hearing students. That was when I am learning about my own identity.
Limbo – June ‘83
I’m stuck in limbo
Between two worlds
Deaf and HearingI’m born deaf
Raised as oral
Learned sign language afterI’m confused
I can’t decide
Which world I should enter…I’m scared
What if I decide to
Go to the Deaf world?I’m going to be ‘deaf’
Lazy to talk
Sign a lotWhat if I decide to
Go to the Hearing World?
I’m going to be ‘normal’Able to talk
Sign much less
Lose several deaf friendsHelp me!
Which way shall I go
Deaf or Hearing?
Another poem is about Sign Language. It was the time that I started to learn sign language. My family was not happy when I began to learn. Especially my mom who freaked out, and my sister criticized me for learning sign language. My dad thought it was a cool thing to do!
Sign Language – June ‘83
Sign Language
ABC’s, #’s, idioms and gestures…
Many different formsASL, Simple English and International
Oh, Sign Language
The world’s beautiful languageUnspoken and mysterious
Not even make a whisper
Fingers, hands and arms
Waving wildly and gracefullyA special kind of communication
For special people
Guaranteed to catch your glance
And never let your eyes go…So beautiful
Will make you sigh…
To all the parents of young deaf babies:
I personally don’t care about cochlear implant. All I care is your deaf baby to get as much language as possible, please consider to give your baby give some signs early as possible, don’t wait please. Also, provide a lot of opportunities for literacy in written and printed English, and of course, listening and speaking skills.
For me, I was diagnosed with hearing loss at age of 2, and was fitted with hearing aids immediately after that. Of course, I know that my parents tried their best to make sure I get speech therapy (perhaps oral/verbal therapy – and that was in 1960’s) and then they enrolled me in the oral day school in NYC. I had a very positive experience in this school, because I felt belonging there.
Last summer, I bumped into my old classmate from my 1st/2nd grade at National Association of the Deaf conference in New Orleans. To my amazement, my classmate is a product of the deaf family and she told me that MOST of my classmates were from deaf families, except me and a few other students. I remembered that they did not use any formal sign language, BUT I know that they did gesture a lot.
So, I wonder about how my deaf classmates who gestured with me by making some kind of visual eye contact, using eye gaze and finger pointing, have HELPED me to develop a very basic social skills and enabled me to communicate with my deaf peers.
In 1974, that was when the PL94-142 “Education for Handicapped Children Act” became a law, and this law allowed my parents to place me in a mainstream program starting my 3rd grade. I didn’t understand why I was moved to a different school, and I felt so alone in the classroom. I was not provided with an interpreter, and consistently pulled out once or twice in a week for tutoring and speech services. Everything gone downhill socially. Academically, I struggled.
When I got home after a very tiring day at public school. My eyes hurt from reading lips all day. I grabbed my old year books from the oral day school, and wondered, “Why am I not there with them anymore? Where are my friends? What they are doing right now?”
My mom brought home bags of library books she borrowed from the library, to help me to catch up with reading. She did that every week.
Few years later, in the 5th grade, my sister taught me fingerspelling from ABC card that she got from her friend. It was a novelty thing for my sister, but it was very meaningful experience for me. For a long time, I kept rehearsing my ABC’s inside of my coat pocket while walking around without being caught.
I was struggling socially through elementary and middle school years, and my mom tried to help with my self-esteem by saying these statements:
“Amy, you are a hard-of-hearing person, and always use hearing aids to help you to hear better. Get your hearing aids now.”
“Amy, you have beautiful speech, better than your oral deaf friends.”
“Amy, you are smart.”
“Amy, you are doing so well in school.”
My mother tried to arrange for ‘play dates’ with other oral deaf kids in my age, and it was an awkward experience. My friends and I communicated through lipreading, using exaggerated mouth movements, and of course, gesturing. No formal sign language was used. Arranging for play dates happened maybe once or twice in a month.
I was the ‘only’ deaf kid in my classroom during my elementary and middle school years. I had about two or three other oral deaf students in school, and we try to interact each other whenever we were pulled out from our classrooms for speech and language services. I usually eat lunch alone or along with other hearing students pretending I understood them.
Then things had changed.
I started my high school in a large mainstream program with 60 deaf and hard of hearing students. My initial reaction after seeing deaf students using sign language was disgust. That kind of attitude was instilled from my own mother who kept telling me that sign language is not good for me, and using speech was better.
It only took one year in high school for me to realize that learning *some* signs did make the difference with socialization which I have lacked during my elementary and middle school years. I was so behind with my social skills, and learning basic signs did help me to ‘connect’ with my peers.
My parents noticed a big change in me. I used signs more and more and interacted with my peers in a daily basis. My mother was not happy.
My mother told me that she wished for me to go NTID/RIT to keep in touch with the ‘hearing world’ and wanted me to become a medical lab technician.
Eh?
I have no desire to become a medical lab technician, and I told my mom that I wanted to become a psychologist.
Guess what? My mom responded back,
“How will you get a job as a psychologist? No one would want to hire you because you cannot hear too well.”
Good thing that I rebelled against my own mother and went ahead to enroll myself at Gallaudet College on my own.
Ohh… my mom was not too happy. My dad was proud of me. He started asking me to teach him some signs.
Few more years later, when I turned 20, my dad passed away. My mother came to see me at Gallaudet and she said,
“Amy, I can truly see how happy you are in Gallaudet, and seeing you being with wonderful friends. I am very proud of you and I love you.”
Four months later, my mom passed away.
I declared my major in Psychology.
I graduated with three degrees in psychology, and became a school psychologist.
Yes, I was a closeted “Deaf” kid trying to hide my deafness and my burning desire to use sign language. Now, its feels too good to come out of the closet right now.
I lifted my head high, looking up and said,
“Mom, only if I can meet you again one more again, I would love to sit down and tell you that I appreciate for what you have done for me. I know you have tried your best to raise me. I love you.”
In closing, to all parents of deaf children, do your best, follow your child’s lead, and give all of the opportunities you can offer to this child. Just love your child. Don’t focus on your child’s ears too much, and it is your child’s “Deaf” spirit that is the most important thing in the world.
Best,
Amy Cohen Efron
(P.S. This blog entry is dedicated to my parents and my husband, Howard, who passed away 9 years ago today.)
February 19th, 2009 at 9:37 pm
*HUGS*
February 19th, 2009 at 10:31 pm
One of the best blog entries. Bless you.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
*sniffle* HEART-TOUCH, especially those people you love are not around anymore. 1983 you had to rehearse ABC’s secretly in your coat pockets is beyond me…. Im certain somewhere out there are kids secretly practice sign or ABC like you did. This reminds me of my sister in law, her mother was an oral teacher of deaf children in Michigan. She forbidden my sister in law-Pat to sign.. long story till Pat reach at 18. Her mother refuse to finance her Deaf college (TVI). Pat’s best friend’s parents ended up support Pat. A year later Pat’s mother died. Pat married my bother and have 3 deaf children, 2 are college-graduated and one is starting now. Pat wonders often if only her mother was alive to see them…
February 19th, 2009 at 11:37 pm
Amy….
Wow, that is very touching! It must be rough time for you all when you tried to struggle with your Deaf identity. It wasn’t easy.
I’m sorry about your parents and husband. I’m sure they’re smiling at you from above heaven.
Hugs, Misha
February 19th, 2009 at 11:39 pm
Amy, a big hug. This story could have been told by many, many other Deaf people, including myself. My parents lived till I reached my 50’s, so there was a further chapter, perhaps to be told later. *hugs* again.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:43 pm
Hi Dianrez,
Thank you so much for a big hug! Yes, I agree that Deaf people need to tell the story, the more stories read by parents, and it’ll help them how to appreciate their own deaf child more and more. I am not angry at my mom, and I understood why she did these things. I would love to have an opportunity to know my parents at this time, especially get to know them as individuals, not as my ‘mom’ or as my ‘dad’. I look forward to hear your story soon.
Thanks,
Amy
February 19th, 2009 at 11:48 pm
Misha, I am positively sure that they are very proud of me, and I find this very cathartic for me to share this story. A great lifting feeling just came off my shoulders by sharing this story with everyone. It was tough to struggle to understand about myself, as a person and these obstacles that I’ve gone through made me strong. If I have my own power to change things, I would love to have an access to language that will help me to interact with peers as easily as possible.
My communication with my mom was smooth and effective. One of my friends mentioned to me how easy to lipread my mother’s lips, and I realized that it was true because we both have a very good communication bond. With this, it makes most parents think why they would want to teach their deaf child to sign, because they feel they can communicate with their child just fine.
Communicating to a child is not the same as the child’s ability to communicate with different people.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:52 pm
LS, Awww… I’d love to meet Pat, and I can relate how she wishes or wondering about her mother often. It happened to me. Yes, I am sure that that some oral deaf adults may share same stories about hiding their signs in private.
When I got home from school, I was alone in my own home (from ages 12 to 15 yrs old), I kept entertaining myself by ‘acting’ at the front of the full-length mirror hanged inside the closet door until I ‘hear/see’ my parents arrived home. I closed the closet door and greeted them. They would ask, “How’s school, Amy?”, I replied back, “Fine.” They have no idea that I was keeping myself entertained through acting.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:52 pm
WAD, Thank you so much for kind compliment. You may go ahead share my blog entry with your friends.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:53 pm
Carrie, Hugs back. I needed that!
February 20th, 2009 at 12:07 am
*Nodding in agreement* Being introduced to the Deaf Culture isn’t easy for a late teen indoctrinated in the oral system l, nor is it easy for the family to see an older teen entering the Deaf Culture.
When I met your mom during her visit at Gallaudet, she looked so happy and so were you. Yes, she was very easy to lipread as she already knew how to talk to oral Deaf people. I am glad your mom had the opportunity to see you at Gallaudet and realized that you were in your elements shortly before she departed from Earth.
My mom had that epiphany, too, realizing that ASL isn’t the evil villain as portrayed by the oral educators.
{{{{Amy}}}}
February 20th, 2009 at 12:13 am
Hi Mishkazena!
{{{{HUGS}}}} it means a lot to me for you to share your personal observations and remembrance of my mother. She is not a bad person, she tried her best and making decisions thinking it was best for me. I know it was hard for her to let me go and allow me to explore my own identity. It is very true what you said. When I read more blog posts by parents of deaf toddlers/children about providing ASL, CI and AVT.. and I thought to myself… wow… these kids with today’s technology and the healthy bonding… these kids will go much much further in life!
Smiles!
February 20th, 2009 at 12:22 am
Amy,
Every parent thought they did their best to their abilities to do the right thing for their children. My parents thought me going to the oral school would help me when I get older however they knew oral wasn’t perfect. They made sure I knew how to talk, use the correct speech and make communications with hearing people. My parents didn’t mind me using ASL with my friends as long as I retained my speech.
Every decision for the parents of deaf children are NOT easy….there are no clear answers at all.
February 20th, 2009 at 1:16 am
Amy you quoted this: When I read more blog posts by parents of deaf toddlers/children about providing ASL, CI and AVT.. and I thought to myself… wow… these kids with today’s technology and the healthy bonding… these kids will go much much further in life!
Amy, you have blood on your hand…oh no…shaking my head…not one hand…but two full hands. Kids going much further in life with today’s technology. Are you joking? You are lying to the whole wide world. You know only very very very very few numbers of Deaf kids succeed using CI or in AVT. You are giving myth information here. Whew! What is wrong with Deafread by encouraging like you to give false and myth info about Deaf children…false propranda about Deaf children. My interpreter at college last year told me in front of my face that almost all Deaf students at H.S. took off their CI when they arrived at school first thing in the morning. Only two or four CI students out of all CI H.S. students did great in school…the rest…all failed!!! I told her…of course!!! Shame on you! Shame shame shame!!!Deafread is an ugly and dark place to have parents get false information about Deaf children. Fault? Yours and others. PURE SHAME!!!
February 20th, 2009 at 4:20 am
Amy
that really *touched heart* and I can relate to you. but ironic here.. my first social language exposure was at the deaf school where I picked up basic signs. However at the same time I was also in speech therapy (talk about confusion). Being from a hearing family, my mom and sister were firm believers that I could learn to talk and wore me out with practice.
I was taken out of deaf school and in first grade at a public school (circa 1963-64). no deaf program period. I spoke perfect gibberish for show and tell! Needless to say I was the only deaf kid in the entire school (both elementary, middle and HS). it was not fun. I know how isolating it can be first hand. Fell back into deaf world after HS graduation and eventually ‘re-learned’ ASL basics and onward. Hence.. I know very well where you’re coming from, girl! 
February 20th, 2009 at 5:10 am
RF Walker,
Thanks for sharing your story with me, and yes, most of us are sharing same stories and we do relate. It was never easy.
Hugs!
Amy
February 20th, 2009 at 5:17 am
Penny,
*Whatever* Shame on me for telling my own story, my feelings and my opinions? *Whatever*
People will read your comments and knowing that there are very vocal people out there who still believe CI is a horrible thing. For me, I *don’t* care anymore. As long this deaf child is exposed to visual language, American Sign Language as consistently as possible.
Amy Cohen Efron
February 20th, 2009 at 7:11 am
Ahhh…
You just explained my upbringing
) And my feelings. Like you, I don’t care about CI as well, as long as the parents have informed and are aware of the need to expose the children to the visual/sign languages as early as possible, even with CI, hearing aids, or without.
I also had a positive experience at Central Institute for the Deaf in 1960’s-1970’s. We used a lot of home signs. I was a solitaire mainstreamed student all through high school, with an exception of another deaf student who entered high school as a freshman, in my senior year. And I was a solitaire student attending a hearing college… then I “discovered” ASL (well, SimCom then in late 1980’s) at NTID and so forth.
Kuddos, Amy.
February 20th, 2009 at 7:17 am
Also, my parents were very supportive of me in my journey as a d/Deaf person. They also suggested that I looked into going to either Gallaudet U. or NTID, but I refused, opting to go to a hearing college instead. They even said they were cool if I learned sign language after I graduated from CID… it was I who refused, feeling intimidated by it, scared that I would not be able to understand it. It was ME who steered my own journey and meeting a wonderful Deaf couple in New Hampshire who signed helped me decide to go to NTID. My father and my stepmom are wonderful, very easy to lipread, even my Deaf children understand them and communicate easily with them… a sense of acceptance by them.
February 20th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Your story is absolutely beautiful. I’m from NYC and I,too, went oral day school. I’m curious which school did you go to. JHS 47 School for the Deaf? or Lexinton School for the Deaf. Please let me know. Thanks! Dorothy Cohler
February 20th, 2009 at 10:45 am
Hi Dorothy!
I believe that we might’ve met once long, long time ago. Thank you for leaving a comment on my blogsite. I attended Lexington School for the Deaf as oral day school when I was young.
Amy
February 20th, 2009 at 12:15 pm
Amy, this is a powerful story. It encouraged me a lot this morning.
February 20th, 2009 at 12:35 pm
Hiii Jeannette!
So glad you left an encouraging comment on my blog, and hey, I kept thinking of you and Ellis! How is he doing? I saw your recent blog entries and he had grown so much!
Have you been in touch or met with other parents of deaf kids with cochlear implants and using ASL too?
Warmly,
Amy
February 20th, 2009 at 10:19 pm
These are the best kind of blog posts. Real stories. Your story. That’s all the matters. Share. Shine. It’s your story for the telling.
Hugs.
~ LaRonda
February 21st, 2009 at 12:20 am
Amy-
You are twisting words here. Be careful. I did not say shame on you for sharing your personal story here. It is no one’s fault for what they went through like you did except for selfish parents and AGB. yes there are some parents were and are not at fault due to AGB and system betrayed them or gave them myth information and false hopes. You know this very well. I do not need to elaborate here. I did not create judgment about your upbringing or experience here. I said shame on you for making a false statement that Deaf kids with today’s technology and the healthy bonding… these kids will go much much further in life! You lied to the public. You know it is not true. You know that only very small numbers of Deaf children succeed with today’s technology. You are responsible for making this statement and everyone will remember this. You said “I don’t care” “whatever”….Deafread does not care either and I will tell children or young adults that you don’t care if they ever share about their traumatic experience when using CI etc. Do not say that I said shame on you for sharing your personal experience. Once again, I said shame on you for making a lie statement to the public in Deafread.
February 21st, 2009 at 12:24 am
One more…You warned me that people will read my comments. I do not care because I have nothing to hide. I am not ashamed of making comments as long as I do not give out myth information…false hopes…hurting our community…doing for my own personal gain…lie to the public and things like that.
February 21st, 2009 at 7:58 am
Penny,
You are shaming on me for my thoughts and opinions. That’s what you are doing.
I made this statement with understanding about today’s technology (not limited to Cochlear Implants), as listed below:
Closed captioning on TVs
Two-way pagers
“Smart” phones
Ipods with captions/text
Open captioning and rear-view captioning in movie theaters
High speed broadband internet connection
Videophones (wired or wireless)
CART
Vlogs and blogs
DVDs and videotapes of ASL stories,
Videoconferencing
Distant Learning through computers (i.e. videoconferencing)
Interpreters
and…. many more.
I did not have that when I was younger. I got my first closed captioning device in 1980, and that when I was only 14 years old. I got my first TTY when I was 17. All of other technology happened no longer than 15 years ago. Today’s Deaf kids have them RIGHT NOW at the time of their birth! They go much,much far than I’ve gone myself.
Cochlear Implants are here to stay, and as long the parents are informed about the risks, the benefits and its limitations. All I am doing is to encourage parents to use American Sign Language as early as possible to Deaf babies and in my story, I emphasized that gesturing and any small opportunities for me to learn sign language really made a big difference for me without realizing that.
I was exposed to gestures and ASL’s eye-gaze and eye contact when I was very young in oral day school with most of my classmates who are from deaf families. I also emphasized the importance of literacy since my mother brought me bags of library books (up to 20 different books altogether) every week to help me with reading, and I emphasized the importance of communication in the family and with peers.
I have seen some kids with cochlear implants and without cochlear implants does not have an access to technology, or not had brought any library books to their homes, and having a very limited communication. These kids will miss out a lot more.
I am so tired of the blaming game, or targeting at AG Bell and the system who ‘betrayed’ them for giving out false information and promoting unrealistic expectations and hopes. I am also tired of being blamed by that. We can do differently than giving AG Bell and the system way too much attention, and we can do something more productive like I’m doing right now. I am focusing on the positive value of using sign language (ASL) to be given to Deaf babies/toddlers with or without cochlear implants.
Thank you, Penny for allowing me to clarify about ‘today’s technology’, and why I think today’s technology and promoting healthy bonding between Deaf babies and parents who use signs, gestures, visual communication as consistently as possible are very important.
Amy Cohen Efron
February 21st, 2009 at 8:04 am
Penny,
One more, you are always welcome to leave your comments on my blog for anyone to see. I know you are not ashamed at all, and you are still a prolific commenter on my blog, and you are able to create a vlog/blog anytime without DeafRead’s aggregator. There are people doing that right now. Go for it, you can share your part of accurate information, truth, helping the community and promoting positive hopes to the public and things like that. I am doing that too. We all always can agree to disagree on some areas, hmm?
Good luck,
Amy
February 21st, 2009 at 9:02 am
I am with Penny’s side all the way.. she is so correct about having someone who is two-faced and have their own conformist by Audism ’s influence as usual. They are all mixed up their head as always. They dont know what they are talking about. Of course many CI deaf children doesn’t want to wear it however they were forced to wear it by teacher as usual or else they ll get punished for not obey the teacher’s demand because their parents says so. RME!!!. This is a real conflict between teacher and deaf children as usual.. No wonder, it s a real abuse toward Deaf babies/children. So therefore, Deaf people are standing up for our Deaf babies/children s rightful to be protected by us Deaf people of the Deaf community not AUDISM community as well.
Deaf means our Deaf ears are not willing to listen so therefore they do not hear spoken language alone. This is the whole point here. Why bother to force Deaf children to listen with the junkie devices that is not always accomplish for every deaf child to hear everything to understand since they ll need their interpreter who is not so great signer all along. No wonder they do not understand it very well and miss out too much in hearing classes with no ASL. NO difference between Deaf children with no devices and Deaf children with hearing devices. Sorry pal.
Open your eyes and see the truth first before hearing people tells you. Mind you! sighs!
DeafSweetMind
February 21st, 2009 at 10:52 am
Amy, thank you for sharing your journey. It really touched my heart to read this.
Technology has indeed opened up different paths for all of us who are deaf and hard of hearing. It allows us to connect in many ways that we didn’t have when we were growing up.
The bottom line is really simple– give each individual a way to communicate their thoughts through language. Then they’ll be able to communicate to the world.
February 21st, 2009 at 11:50 am
Penny, why don’t you blog/vlog about these children who are not doing well with c.i.? If you feel the parents should hear about these cases, then what’s stopping you?
February 21st, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Hi Amy! Thank you for sharing your intimate, moving story. Wow, I never realized we had so much in common in our backgrounds. Maybe that’s why we bonded in school psych grad school.
I knew you went to the oral school in NYC, but not that you were mainstreamed after that. I’ve always admired the beauty, grace, and artistry of your ASL expression.
From personal experience, I know how lonely and isolating it is to be the only deaf kid in a hearing school. My mom was like yours, she took me to the library every week and I brought home big stacks of books. Books were my friends and taught me about the world what I couldn’t get from hearing. Like yours, my mom is very easy to lipread. I thank my family that they always talked to me about anything and never “dumbed down” their conversation, and patiently repeated themselves until I understood. Now that my family all has Internet, our communication is effortless and frequent!
Unlike yours, my folks never promoted oralism, praised my speech, or put down sign language or other deaf people. I was the only deaf child I or my parents knew, and trying to immerse in the hearing world of the 60s and 70s was all that we knew what to do. None of us knew a thing about sign language or the deaf community.
Technology has opened up the whole world, hearing and deaf. We can all read each others’ words and consider and respond to their thoughts. Parents and kids today have the power of knowledge and the tools of technology at their fingertips. They have so many more options. Like you, knowing ASL and being a part of the deaf community has been a boon and a blessing in my life. I would wish that all deaf babies and their parents have opportunity to learn this language too, as it will help them and not prevent them from developing speech, if that is their wish.
love ya!
Patty
February 21st, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Can I say something to Penny if you allow me to speak with?
Penny –
Amy and I are the same boat. I have to make an amendment with Amy’s comment#27 and #28.
Whether they are oral or not, does not matter if they are CIs or not, they are truly grateful to have such wonderful today’s technology, including the equipments.
We cannot afford to reject any of them if we have the today’s technology. We cannot, could not, would not afford to reject any of them.
Look, I feel bad for Helen Keller and her timeframe. Helen Keller and others did not have everything like we have today. Think about it, Penny.
Ok, I honestly feel bad that many people with no insurances could not get any of those equipments nor services.
Take a hard look at Africa with several wars (Congo, Darfur and Somalia), they need some help. I feel bad for them as well. They do not everything.
February 21st, 2009 at 3:59 pm
Amy-
You were not clear in the first place what you meant by today’s technology. You mentioned about today’s technology right after you talked about CI so I thought you were referring to CI only as today’s technology.
I am shaming you for lying to the public that it is okay for kids to have CI and you do not care about it. You are a school psychologist working with Deaf children and I believe that you have seen many CI kids failed in education and other issues. (I said many…not all of them). It is my and others fault for not speaking out or doing something when CI was invented. We were sleeping for a long time. NAD did not care about it and many other organizations too. I feel that it is our moral responsibility to get the truth message out to the public as much as we can about CI since we have access to do that today.
I learned there are some people are doing something productive to give better hope for all Deaf children. The plan won’t be perfect but it will be good. I always feel that if all deaf people are united and fight against AGB all the way it will work. Look at Jewish community as they have very strong unity. They got their nation back in 1948. They did it however we do not have this kind of unity in our community. Sad.
It is imperative to talk about the importance of ASL and Literacy for all Deaf children which you shared that too but I still feel that as a responsible citizen like you and me we must tell the truth about CI and other issues. I am sure you have heard or read this poem by Pastor Martin Niemoller. He wrote:
First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out
because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.
Kids are being fixed, forced, and humiliated to get CI and we did not speak out for them. What will we experience in future that no one will speak out for us including CI kids when they become adults? It can happen to us. We can’t foresee in future but it is possible. Scary.
February 21st, 2009 at 4:21 pm
Hi Penny again,
Please share with the world what you have seen on your blog. I am not the only one who encourage you to have your own blog. Having a blog is a wonderful opportunity for you to share your thoughts through your own “voice” (ASL, words, pictures, and etc.) and you will be heard by many, many people.
Good luck,
Amy
February 22nd, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Amy,Although our upbrining is a weee different; the ideas our parents carried throughout their lives are defnitely the same; My father made the exact statements that your mother made to you. I was in all hearing classes until middle school years; then attended mainstreamed programs through out high school. After arriving in the mainstreamed classroom I never was challenged accademically; and my parents never questioned the professors as to why was my work so low.
My dad was thinking of getting me a stand in the mall and have me sell baked potatoes with varied of toppings!!! .. He thought I would never make it through any collge yet alone grad school. He thought I was too dumb and too slow; regardless of having two accemically advanced parents and siblings.. so, in a way we walked miles in the same pair of shoes..
Thank you for sharing.. Even though your parents are not alive now, I want to assure you that you have loved ones surrounding you. You know you can come to any one of your friends and you will be supported.. My arms and shoulders are open for you to cry upon.. You’re a wonderful woman…
human
February 23rd, 2009 at 3:15 pm
Amy,
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal. I hope that writing it was a cathartic experience for you. Your experiences have without a doubt made you an excellent psychologist and advocate. Hugs to you, Jodi
February 23rd, 2009 at 6:40 pm
Dear Amy,
*HUGS* for your wonderful, heartwarming, and inspiring story. I am sure you have many more to share (and please do so!)
Your experiences are yours alone, and by sharing these you’re giving us the honor and privilege to have rare glimpses into your personal life. Thank you.
You’re also a gentle and caring soul, who cares deeply about D/deaf children.
Our focus, I agree, needs to be on nurturance of that “spirit” within, in all ways possible. This is precisely where our energies need to be focused, on the positives all around.
*HUGS*
March 1st, 2009 at 5:03 pm
Hi Amy,
I just came across this blog entry. Thank you for sharing your story! I think I remember you from YSP ‘91. If you could E-mail me, that would be great.
March 5th, 2009 at 12:10 am
wow… I will write soon but right now I cannot bc im in tears. thanks you for sharing.
Soon on my blog will be post about my life grow up hardof hearing check it soon:
http://growinguphardofhearing.blogspot.com/
Smile*
Danielle
July 27th, 2009 at 6:42 pm
That is sad but postitive in a way to show that deaf people can stand on their own two feet and also have the courage to go through life with people close to them die in a short space of time and you have to go through all that emotionally…I wonder how you managed to get through life and if you did grieve at all? I lost my mother recently at Easter and its hard without her, there are so many things i want to tell her and how you go through life, major at Gally and have a life, it is rewarding to read that we are not the only ones….
Take care Amy and all the best…